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Love Where the Black Woman Is Not White

At a first glance from the average black female, I’m dateable, if the thought comes across her mind. However, if my fingers should ever cross the knuckles of a white hand, I am dead to her; I am no longer a “brotha.” In this case, you are witnessing a type of black on black hatred that originates from insecurity. Black women and men are dealing with a shortage of swagger in their own skin. The black profile loses it smoothness while sharing space with a white person because our minds operate on an “us” and “them” mode. “Oh, he’s with that white wench, the sistas must not be good for that Uncle Tom,” We’ve heard it all before, right? It’s wrong.

We continue to carry inferiority because upon looking in the mirror and noticing we aren’t white, we see ugliness. It’s not by coincidence that more black women choose the relaxer over locks or that younger women want color contacts. A black man with a white woman reminds the black woman that she is not enough and the response is anger. I walk through Boy’s town one day with a friend of mine, a white female, and I feel the hostility. As we pass a black woman, the urge to maintain her pride leads her to shout, “We’ll steal your man honey!” She doesn’t have to know that we aren’t dating.  The hatred is inspired by just seeing a white woman next to a black man; he found someone better, someone white. So now we hear, “since he got himself a white girl, Ima get me a Sylvester Stallone.”  Violence, yet again. It’s a sad situation these days; love is becoming revenge. Not only does the myth of inferiority weaken the black woman by making her see only filth in the mirror, but it also makes her want to hurt the black man. One of the biggest problems in the black community comes from a lie.

The creation of the fib has it place in history, but it’s time to forget. Black women, if you see me walking down the street with the girl of my dreams and she happens to be white, please understand that I didn’t choose her because she is white. Love finds its way through a combination of timing and the perfect personality. Understanding love will cure the pain that we still feel from being told years ago that we aren’t human, that we were only good for picking cotton, separate but equal, etc. When interracial relationships bond people, society comes closer to realizing that the difference in levels of humanity is truly non-existent. I don’t love a brown haired, light skinned, German, but I do love an aspiring journalist with a feminist twist.  Together, we are taking that true step towards understanding equality.

Love can be "unthinkable," are you ready for a love that transcends cultural consideration?